CRITICISM

According to the English dictionary, criticism is a critical judgement passed or expressed. It is the act of blaming or condemning people's opinions. Majority of us are victims of this. When we do things or say things that we know it is right and acceptable, that's when someone will come out and tackle those things. We sometimes feel bad but very few of us know how to handle criticism. I want you to know that it's not everything you do or say that will be accepted even if you think you are right. When you know that,you won't be trived when people criticise you. When you understand that everyone can't have the same point of view and mentality, then you will be able to handle criticism. Mind you, don't let the opinions of others to kill your own voice. Don't let the criticism of people to create fear in you i.e fear of not being accepted or your ideas not being accepted. Before I explain more about criticism, I would like to point out a very important factor that will be our guide to unleashing how we can handle criticism. This factor is called MINDSET. Waoh! You are surprised right? Yeah, we have to talk about that First.

     Our mindset is the root of all personalities we express. I.e our personalities grow out of our mindset. The view you adopt for yourself ultimately affects the way you lead your life. Your mindset is just the beliefs you adopt for yourself. It becomes your guide. There are 2 types of mindset

1) FIXED MINDSET: this kind of mindset creates an urgency to prove yourself over and over again. People with this mindset always want to proof themselves wherever they are. They only want to keep winning, but when they fail, they start to see the the situationas a direct measure of their competence and worth. That's when you hear them say“ I have no life”, “i am a loser”, “i am a total failure”. They love to remain at the position they are. They don't want to move forward because they fear they might loose their previous success stature. 

2) GROWTH MINDSET: This mindset is based on the belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts. People with this mindset believe that they could always get better. So they don't remain the way they are rather they keep growing. The passion for stretching yourself and sticking to it even when it is not going well is the Hallmark of the growth mindset. They learn from their failures and are never limited by it. 

Fixed mindset-------> focus on permanent  traits,  and fear challengesdevalue efforts

 Growth mindset-----> focus on development, challenges and efforts.

      People with fixed mindset are the ones that are mostly affected by criticism. The always want to be perfect so if the get criticised, they break down and even back down. people with the growth mindset have no issue with criticism because they see every situation as an avenue to learn and grow. They are likened to be optimists who see no negativity in criticism, rather they analyse. Now let's learn how the growth mindset helps to handle criticism.

Criticism is of two types; self criticism (you criticising yourself) and external criticism(the critical judgement gotten from people around you). Criticism is a value initiated act. It is as a result of your values or the values of others. Self criticism is judging yourself based on the values,beliefs and principles you stand by. You judge yourself based on what you place value upon. This kind of criticism is also called self evaluation. You evaluate and analyse the things you do based on what you place value on. External criticism is the judgement you get from people around you. I want you to know that people judge you based on the value the live and stand bye. They use their beliefs to criticize you. It is not that you are wrong or they are wrong, the difference between you and them is value. So how do we handle criticism? 

Going back to what I explained on the growth mindset, it will be our study guide to how we can handle criticism. Growth mindset people are the master of self analysis. They analyse the situation and bring out a lesson in it. For example, a man with the growth mindset failed his english examination. Let see how he will handle the issue. First, he will analyse and understand how he failed his exam despite studying harder(i.e trying to see from the examiner's angle). Probably because his grammatical expressions were not suitable for the exam or his choice of linguistic approach weren't correlating to the questions. He them think of a way to correct himself (probably meeting the examiner or studying more on linguistic approach in examination). Through this process, he comforts himself and prepares his mind for greater work. This is the same way we can handle criticism too.

listen to the critics

Try to see things from their angle and reason with them.

Weigh their words with your values.  Does it correlate? 

If their explanation is valid, accept it. If not, share your opinions with them and explain from your own stand point

Respect their opinions even if you are not gonna accept it. It is a sign of maturity.

Note: there is a big difference between criticism and correction. Most people make this mistake. Criticism is usually a harsh judgement which brings people down if not properly handled and  it's negative. Correction is positive and it lift people up to be better.